Has this ever happened to you? You’ll be having a decent conversation with someone and all of the sudden they blow up? You can’t even figure out why- Was it something I said? Did? Who can even say? Why do they immediately revert to anger? What is this conversation even about anymore?
So, I know this person and it doesn’t happen too often, but when it does it is lethal. The way I remember one of these deadly conversations went something like this:
“Hey, can you go do this?” (I must mention that this person was doing nothing at the time while I had been spending a few hours on my homework)
“Hold on… I’m working on my homework.”
Cue angry yelling:
“Why can’t anyone ever do what I ask them to? Is it too much for me to ask this? Does it affect your life that much? I am constantly doing stuff for you- why can’t you ever do anything for me!!”
By that time I was flustered and exasperated. I realized that I probably should have helped right away, but why, I thought: “Why should I stop what I am doing to help you, when you are doing nothing yourself?” Then I realized. I was being selfish, only thinking of my immediate need- to get my homework done and then I could help. I wasn’t thinking of the needs of the person in front of me.
Now this conversation could also be interpreted the other way around. The person that I was talking to could of offered me with help on my homework, but they didn’t. Either way you look at it, this conversation could be interpreted as selfish.
Now if we back up and see it from an audience point of view, we could apply the Golden Rule: treat others the way you want to be treated. If I were my friend would I of wanted immediate help? Yes. If my friend were me, would they of wanted help with their homework? Probably. We need to examine our situations and act on them in ways we would like to be treated.
We also need to think of this person and what is going on in their life now. Is something affecting their behavior and attitude? Is there anyway that you can help with this? Make sure that you don’t immediately jump to conclusions: “They’re always so mad!” “She only thinks of herself!” “He never thinks about how this affects me!” Because, chances are, they are struggling with something more than you know, and they are lashing out their anger as a result.
When Jesus was asked what the most important commandment was, he answered that it was to “Love your neighbor and Love God”.
No matter how someone may treat you or react to what you say, love them no matter what.
“12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15: 12-13
To lay down your life for your friends is the greatest kind of love. Meaning, love is doing what your friends need from you (within appropriate limits), loving them, and making sacrifices for them. We need to “love our neighbors as ourselves” because God has shown us the greatest love though sending his son to die for us on the cross.
I don’t know about you, but that is the kind of love that I want to be treated with, and the kind that I would like to give in return! 🙂 I will be praying for you! And remember, God is always on your side- so be strong because God will help you through any fight!
If you don’t know how to help someone, ask God to guide you! Let Him help you help others, even those who are especially hard to love!
Have a lovely week, and remember to love others as God has loved you!
Picture Source: ministry-to-children.com (Picture Link)